A man must be able to meet his woman with consciousness equivalent to her energy.
The feminine destructress must be met by the masculine destroyer.
The goddess of devotion must be met by the god of all-pervading love.
Dark or light, a man can't be stuck in, or avoid, any areas of his masculine capacity or his woman will test him there.
These areas of testing are usually first on the dark side. Only after trust is established there, only when the dark feminine lover knows she will be met by the dark masculine lover, will testing proceed toward the light.